Miracles or Grievances

So lets analyze this, shall we? Lets just say, if you are in a relationship like this, and the other person is getting mad because you are simply telling a story, or talking about your day, I would promptly say this does not embody wholeness in the other, acceptance of the other or support you in anyway! When the light blinks on and we see people for who they are, sometimes it is earth shattering. We put our entire selves into this relationship thinking this person loved us at least a little and wanted to change and build with us. Sometimes we never want to admit we were so clueless and refuse to change thinking that if we love them enough we will change them. That is your own mental illness and victimization and not wanting to be alone. If you continue your life this way you never will experience total transformational self love or get to be loved the way you were intended to be. Your cutting yourself off from the most amazing parts of life and will be stuck in the same mindset as your abuser. Is that what life is supposed to be like for you?

If the person you are with does not think 90% of what you do is amazing, then its time to see this person for what they are! If you are with someone who ever says anything but encouraging, loving words to you, you are not in a love relationship you are in a relationship with a narcissistic person and I would recommend to think of how this is raising you up, spiritually, mentally or emotionally?

I am not saying a narcissist cannot change, but to change they have to admit they are a narcissist and that is nearly impossible. Its very likely that trauma as a child caused this narcissism and someone allowed this person to get away with it or fed into it. If you find yourself in a relationship with a narcissist and want some support or someone to listen, I am here for you. I have dealt with narcissistic personality disorder in some way shape or form for all of my life. They love givers, they love genuine, kind and people full of love and transparency. So don't feel like its you, its not you, well its you, but its all the good things about you.

The problem is, they can create what you are to them out of someone else they deem to fill their needs. So its not you, that they love, adore, etc. Every relationship is the same, they, on purpose, seek out these kind of people to manipulate and take advantage of. They never try to learn you, know you, or build anything with you. You are there until you leave, since all do, and then they will seek someone else to fill the exact place you did.

These people are void of love and emotion because it was never shown to them. But at the end of they day they could have tried to heal, but chose not to. So this is not your issue, this is a typical narcissist person's behavior, and you are wasting your time. No matter how much you think you love them could you really love someone who uses you. Who purposely says things and does thing to see you hurt? Do you want to be with a person who doesn't care who they have sex with, if it affects you, that lies all the time, most likely does drugs or is an alcoholic or they are addicted to something else like yoga or church.

These people have little self control, blame you for their shortcomings, never ever want to seek help and at the end of the day are totally unavailable in every aspect. They wont come to family functions with you, they wont take you to the dr., or even a surgery, and think nothing of it. These are very shallow people who feed off of the emotions of others and love to hurt people. These people never think what they have done is that bad, and could care less if it hurt your feelings or you felt betrayed. They will always make excuses for their behavior and are always the victim, 100% of the time. If a grown adult is victimizing themself to their partner, its time to go, because that is just mental illness.

Don't put up with shitty behavior in your life if you want to grow and learn and be your best self. It does not matter how good looking or good in bed these people are, you are just a vessel for them to shit on, and basically take all their negativity and they leave you feeling depleted, lonely, desperate, and exhausted. And the funny thing is, that is what these people embody. They rarely have any new friends, their own family spends little time with them. They are insecure, desperate, lonely and exhausting to be around, not to mention totally basic. To have a personality like this is not to want to understand self, its to not want to grow, its to not want to experience the world unfold, these people have to control every aspect of their lives, but have no self-control or mental agility, they have no idea how to handle anything, they are the weakest people in society, they are so stuck on self they cannot imagine anyone but them exists in the world, and every person is a game. That has to be so frustrating and tiring at the end of the day, and it is, these people hate themselves most of all but refuse to look inward.

You have to let people like this go. I would say its better to be alone that to ever be around someone like this who sucks all your energy, your trust, your ability to see good in people and they take it and smash it into 10,000 pieces and could care less. Its not worth the time and energy to deal with humans like these. Its a waste of effort, time and life quite frankly, and anytime you say stay away, its like an invitation to seek you out more, because these people have the most terrible boundaries on the planet, and ignore whatever you say, they do what they want and that is it.

If you want help or just to talk through if you know someone like this or ARE someone like this, I can help you with some simple steps to make a transformation that will be so incredible you will be amazed. Not all of it is amazing, all the time, but the results will definitely outweigh the tough times of getting through this. Its hard to change but so worth it, for yourself most of all.

Reach out to me if you want help in this area, and I always wish everyone a wonderful, amazing life and will reiterate, in every moment we have the choice between miracles and grievances. What will you choose?